Michael Marley Column - Toro, Toro, Toro, Harder They Fall Remake

Valuev's Got 'An Iron Jaw And A Cast Iron Stomach. Not A Man Alive Can Hurt Him.'

 

Eddie Willis tells Toro to throw his fight with Buddy Brannen to avoid getting hurt]
 
Toro Moreno: I don't know, I don't know. What would people think of me?
Eddie Willis: What do you care what a bunch of bloodthirsty, screaming people think of you? Did you ever get a look at their faces? They pay a few lousy bucks hoping to see a man get killed. To hell with them! Think of yourself. Get your money and get out of this rotten business.

THE HARDER THEY FALL, 1956

The hard sell of King's Kong, 7-foot-tall and 325 pound WBA heavyweight champion Nickolay Valuev, was in high gear in New York today. The road show will continue on to Chicago, where the 44-0 Valuev will defend his crown on October 7 (HBO) against Monte Barrett, and to Los Angeles. Tinseltown is where this dog and Clydesdale show should've begun and ended.

It was veteran Danish promoter Mogens Palle who first cracked, when hearing that Don King wanted to nickname the mammoth champion he shares promotionally (for how long?) with Germany's Wilfried Sauerland King Kong, that the rumors were false. "No," Palle said, "he wants to call him King's Kong."

The "King Kong" theme continued today as King, Valuev, Sauerland and their various factotums were more than a hour late for a press conference at the Firebird Russian Restaurant on West 46 Street. The reason given was that publicity photos had to be taken on the roof of the Empire State Building. That they did with King standing next to his "Jolly Green Giant" (DK can't stick to one nickname or theme, he always have three to four variations, fyi) as King held up a mini-model of the famous building. (Btw, DK and HBO the free crackers were stale, the vodka unavailable and the caviar invisible. JetBlue serves better lunches.)

 
They did not even have a Fay Wray look alike that Valuev could hold in his humongous arms. But what do you expect because all these marketing geniuses, including the HBO squad, have the wrong movie.

The special guest today should've been my friend, the legendary writer Budd Schulberg. It was 50 years ago that, hot on the heels of the Schulberg-written


"On The Waterfront" (Brando as Terry Malloy who "couldda been a contender'), Schulberg and other created the boxing classic, 'The Harder They Fall." In the movie, the great Humphrey Bogart is the cynical former Brooklyn Eagle boxing columnist turned fight flack (talk about a movie I can personally identify with)

It turns (Eddie Willis) Bogart's stomach at first and finally what remains of his conscience as the hulking heavyweight "Toro Moreno" is brought through the ranks with one set-up after another. Toro is about as dumb and innocent as they come and he is easily hoodwinked into believing that he really has ring talent.

The beauty of the movie is not watching the laughable boxing scenes but the ones in which Bogart wrestling with that tattered conscience. Bogie is brilliant in answering his former colleague's questions about Moreno's fistic prowess?

First Reporter: Can he box?
Eddie Willis: No Gene Tunney.
Second Reporter: Can he punch?
Eddie Willis: Not like Jack Dempsey.
Third Reporter: Well, what's he got besides just being big?
Eddie Willis: He's got an iron jaw and a cast-iron stomach. Not a man alive can hurt him.

This could be the 50 years later remake of "The Harder They Fall." It could be "Requiem For A Heavyweight." It could be an international version of "Fat City" with the fighter being a drunkard. But it isn't King Kong wearing Everlast gloves and isn't any feel good "Rocky" with a Roman numeral attached to it.

Until today, I had never seen Toro Valuev, er I mean Nickolay Moreno in person. I had only seen a fleeting glimpse of his prior bouts. In the back of the room, King henchman Bobby Goodman was grasping for adjectives to describe Valev's style or lack of same and I can imagine seeing flashbacks of the Schulberg flick in his mind as well.

Some drone introduced Valev upon his entrance into the dais at the Firebird "as the Eighth Wonder of the World."

King was really reaching, describing Big Nick as "being undefeated and he's never lost." Leaving the Department of Redundancy Department, King predicted that Valuev would "unify and re energize the heavyweight championship. " With a real rabbi, Rabbi Shea Hecht looking on, and former Showtime boxing VP, unofficial "Rabbi Roy" Langbord in the house, at least King did not go into a discourse on "American Jewishprudence." Then, as he does about every 30 seconds, King shifted gears. He wanted to invoke the spirit of Rocky, not the Stallone flicks, but the real heavyweight Rocky.

"You cannot vilify him," King said looking out into the crowd in search of such naysayers. "You can't character assassinate him. He is 44-0 and he is five fights away from tying Rocky Marciano's record."

I'm sure Mr. Marcheggiano must be spinning like a veritable gyroscope in his grave now. He withstood the challenge of a great heavyweight named Larry Holmes (with a bit of help from Michael Spinks). How would the Brockton Blockbuster thwart the St. Petersburg Slapper? Before anyone could laugh, King threw in a capper.

"He is still a champion. He is undefeated...He can think...He is intelligent."

Toro Moreno returns a half century later! He wants to become the undisputed champ! And this time he has a brain! Coming soon to your HBO screen.

HBO's Kery Davis went into some lame rap about how he is constantly being asked in barbershops "what's the story with this big Russian guy? Is this guy the real deal or not?' I didn't know Davis traveled to Brighton Beach, Russia, or Germany to get his hair cut but I suppose it builds up his frequent flyer mileage. He needs to tweak that one, and say that when he goes to get his head cut, he is asked "what's the story with this Baldomir or Baltimore guy? He beat Judah and Gatti. Can he beat Pretty Boy on November 4?" That one will come off as more authentic.

Offstage, where there was no mention of Yuri's Brighton Beach Barber Shop, We Cut Heads, Davis was more real.

"He's got a chance." Davis said, "to make a good first impression."

Who in the room who does not have a hand in Nickolay/Toro's big pockets could actually enlighten me about Valuev the fighter? I scoured the room and, believe me this room and the crowd could stand plenty of scouring, and I saw him.

The Enlightened One. The Pugilistic Pharmacist. The Man Whom Made "Ring Generalship" a National Catch Phrase. None other than Harold Lederman. Good, bad or indifferent, Harold would give it to me straight, no chaser. I don't want to say Lederman takes boxing too seriously but he can talk for 36 hours straight about Fighting Harada or Pone Kingpetch.

Please don't disappoint me, pal Hal.

He did not. Lederman started tracking Bigfoot Valuev on May 31, 1997, in Atlantic City when Valuev, in his ninth pro bout and his first in America, scored a two-round TKO over someone named Terrell Nelson. Big Nick was a slim and trim 316 pounds then just four pounds lighter than in his most recent bout, a title defense in which stopped hapless Owen "I Don't Give A Heck" Beck in three.

This is why I view Lederman as a boxing anthropologist, a bit of a Margaret Mead of the fight game. He sees such things and has near total recall of them many years later.

"He punches fairly well for a guy his size," Lederman said. "But he is only a fair puncher. He is, due to his size, very hard to get inside on. I tell you I thought he lost to (John) Ruiz when I saw it on tape. I thought Ruiz should've gotten the decision. He outworked Valuev. In that fight, John got busy, he threw punches."

( For the record, and before the myth encircles the man, a judge from New Zealand called that title bout a 114-114 draw. A judge named Derek Milham from Australia had a 116-114 Valuev tally but, to get there, he called two rounds even. Milham, who should be banned immediately if not sooner, had the ninth and 12th rounds even. In that final round, a Mexican judge preferred Valuev so the scoring of the final round was 1-1-1. The Mexican judge's final score was 116-113.)

You can discard your Hype-O-Meter around Lederman. But I dared to ask if he agreed that Valuev was the monster of the division, that he could and would bring back glory to the heavyweight scene.

Lederman looked at me as though I had just asked for Oxycontin without a proper prescription. Maybe, he must've thought, Marley is warming up for November's Johnny Bos Roast.

"No," Lederman said. "He's got a nice jab but it's a pushing jab. But, as far as punching power, well let's just say Valuev is no Earnie Shavers. Klitschko has the best skills of the four heavyweight champs. " (Isn't that sweet music for the songwriting team of Lampley & Merchant?)

And Shavers, labeled "The Acorn" by Muhammad Ali, was no Toro Moreno.

"Reporter: What gives, Eddie? I looked up Toro in the book. There's no record of him in South America.
"Eddie Willis: He knocked out thirty-eight guys in a row. None of them went over three rounds. You believe that one and I'll tell you another."

Don King just told New York another. Tomorrow it's Chicago's turn and then out to Hollyweird.

It's 'They Harder They Fall, The Remake." From 1956 to 2006.

Schulberg should've been there today. He wrote the script. Literally. He would instantly recognize the new Toro Moreno.

Monte Barrett may not be it but Valuev will run into his Buddy Branner soon enough. I don't see any Eddie Willis around to protect this gentle giant, either.

Unless..."there's not a man alive who can hurt him."
 

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